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Showing posts from May, 2013

another school year almost done

my son turned 9 in april, and now is almost done 3rd grade... where does the time go?

this school year has been an interesting one...

my son has dyslexia. he flips letters up, down, and sideways. a "b" can be a "d", a "q", or a "p".
on top of this, he started at a new school this year where most of the kiddos have grown up together.
very quickly they picked up on the fact the new kid gets pulled from class for special ed time and to be with his reading specialist. half way through the year, the "small jabs" had become full on bullying. he would spend recess and lunch alone. kids would call him dumb, pull pranks on him, and more. it got to the point he would be in tears over having to go to school, and being a mother with a broken heart over her kiddo going through such bullying (and since i myself had been bullied as a child), i allowed him to stay home a few times, and even looked into pulling him from public school and home schooli…

been a hot minute (part 3)

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i have so many random thoughts in my head right now, this post is going to be where i get them out ;o)

where to begin...
being (non) judgmental
i have found that people are confused about what all encompasses the word/action, judgmental.
to be judgmental is to state opinion as fact.
acknowledge the harmful, the unwholesome, but don't judge it.
for example: she is a bad parent. (judgment)
in my opinion i feel she is a bad parent because... (opinion)

as well, what most do not realize, is that you can (appear/seem to) be judgmental via tone of voice, body language, the way your word "things", actions, etc.
another example: when discussing a topic with someone and making comments directed at their circumstances such as, "bully for you", "big deal", "you're over reacting", etc. (judgmental)
rather, show empathy & compassion and try to understand where the person you are talking to is coming from.
remember, to be judgmental of others…

been a hot minute (part 2)

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and i am back ;o)

soooo along with making ineffective choices when it comes to the men in my life, i have also been making ineffective choices for me over all.
since christmas/new years, i have really "fallen off the wagon".
drinking too much... doing drugs when i drink... promiscuity due to getting too drunk... depression, etc... over spending... and due to stress and being intoxicated, i started cutting again (which i have now stopped again).
i have been in a down ward spiral and am very disappointed in myself. at the same time, i am also thankful and proud i am mindful enough to see the problem. for the last month i have been working to get back to "healthy me". it is a slow process, but i am working at it.
deep breaths and baby steps to success :o)
it is so much easier to go backwards then it is forwards, but going forward and fighting for ourselves is how we find our true strength.

to help get back to "healthy me", i am going to go back through…

been a hot minute...

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how are all of you?
i am... exhausted. mentally and physically. much has happened since i have been able to write... even during the period i last wrote.
where shall i start... ?
 ok, so mid-late december i started dating a guy, let us call him d.b. d.b. and i started off, like many, in the "honeymoon" phase. he could do no wrong in my eyes. then i started noticing how judgmental he was. next it was his coldness towards my recovery process from the abuse of my previous relationship. and then i noticed his tendancy to try and control me (in varying ways, not always the typical and what one would think). along with this, though embarassing to discuss, i was not sexually satisfied. due to trying to push these issues aside, hoping for the best, wanting things to work more than anything... factors led me to cheat on d.b. - something i swore i would never to do someone as i have been cheated on (more than once), and never wanted to hurt someone in that way. b-u-t when you do no…