Call me out, Please!
What don't you like about yourself?
I mean, REALLY don't like?
For myself, it's how opinionated I have become, and in turn, how my dissociative parts deal with conversations, situations and the like that go against my/their opinions and/or beliefs. ...Let's put this as nicely as possible... I don't want to be a b!tch anymore!
This may sound crazy, calling myself a b!tch, but it's reality as I really can be high & mighty, condescending, rude, bitchy, and similar negative, descriptive verbs.
It hasn't always been this way, which makes this attitude bother me more.
Bit of a back story...
I used to be painfully shy & quiet! Painfully is not being dramatic; as an example, elementary school teachers would yell at me for being too quiet, and I was bullied by kids. As a teen, it meant I didn't stand up for myself and allowed things to happen to me that are partly why I have dissociative disorder. And as an adult, I landed up in a 5 year abusive relationship. End result? When triggered, this Sam looses control, and another Sam takes over, and let's whomever is assaulting my views, opinions, or similar, have it! While that personality is here for a reason, (and before I realized what was going on, do not get me wrong, I was just glad I could finally stand up for myself, but) this personality has gained too much strength and is causing me to be alienated; it's too strong!
So I am asking all of you to help me with my "therapy". Please help me become a better version of myself; Please Call Me Out!!!
Notice me being b!tchy? Call me out!!!
Notice me being defensive? Call me out!!!
Notice me being condescending? Call me out!!!
All I ask is that you be kind when you do. We don't want to trigger me haha
I know one of the first steps to working on this issue is to really practice the skills I was taught in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy; be present, be mindful, acknowledge what is, accept what is, let go, and move on.
...But what if my brain is convinced it can change something, and won't let go, like a dog on a rope?
Stop. Belly breath. Acknowledge & Accept. Repeat as needed.
Not always possible when I am triggered, so that is why I need your help; That is why I need you guys to call me out when you notice me being a "Mean Girl".
And, THANK YOU! Thank you ahead of time for your help ❤
Until next time friends,
Live. Laugh. Love.